Monthly Archives: February 2012

2/17/12 – Wishes

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“Wishing is good for us. Daydreams, fantasies, castles in the air, and aspirations all drive us forward, impel us to make things happen. They also tell us a lot about ourselves. Our wishes come straight from our core, and they are loaded with vital info.”

I have this weird attraction and love for dandelions. I just think they are so beautiful and complex yet full of a crazy hope for dreams and fantasies and wishes to come true. We blow on a little flower and put the energy of our biggest wishes into those little “petals” as they fly into the open air of opportunity and the unknown. How cool is that? It’s like making a wish at 11:11. We do it with only faith and hope to go on. And it feels so good to put your wishes out there. The little things that we yearn for inside that no one gets to see, except for this little weed.

To me that represent so many things: hope, faith, wishes, dreams, but, most of all, letting go. Letting things fly away and getting things off your chest. Doing this, like following our dreams, is what helps to make things happen. It’s the little start we need to help us move forward. That all being said always remember the following too:

“Always leave something to wish for; otherwise you will be miserable from your very happiness.” – Baltasar Gracian, Spanish Philosopher and Writer

This beautiful image below is linked to a totally unrelated article I read today about “The Gift of Uncertainty.” Check it out!

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2/15/12 – Managing Difficult Emotions

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Th excerpt below is from a brilliant article I read today which is linked at the end. PLEASE take the time to read. I think this is SO important in today’s society to understand how to manage difficult emotions and the importance of doing so. Enjoy!

True Strength: Learning to Feel What Is – Nancy Colier

“Sadness is part of every single life, with no exceptions. And yet we pretend that a life in which sadness is denied is more admirable or well-lived than one in which it is acknowledged. To feel sadness when something sad is happening is appropriate and truthful…

Strength is a measure of how we handle the challenges of life, not whether they show up. The challenges will come, of that we can be sure. But can we acknowledge the truth, face the hard feelings, work with them, learn from them and ultimately heal from them? These are the markers of strength… 

As a society, we have no idea how to experience and be with sadness — or fear, anxiety, anger or frustration for that matter. We are not educated on how to manage difficult emotions, one of life’s most important skills. Rather, we are taught (and are teaching our children) that sadness is the enemy and that if we allow it to exist, it will destroy us. As a result, we will do anything and everything to avoid feeling it. Even funerals are designed to make us happy, to celebrate the wonderful life the person enjoyed, but certainly not to feel sad that they are no longer here. Our entire self-help industry is tailored to help us avoid feeling sad, to teach us how to arrange our lives so that we never have to feel anything difficult. Where these programs fail however, is when we end up in a situation where we cannot control or deny our sadness. Then what? Then we are deemed weak, and worse — failures for feeling what is actually appropriate.

In truth, we can learn to be with sadness, not to fear it, but to simply accept it as another of life’s experiences that can be lived through. The fact that sadness appears is not a sign of our failure. Its absence is not a sign of strength, other than perhaps the strength of denial. Sadness is simply a part of life. The sooner we allow it a seat at our inner table, the sooner we can get on with the business of living. When we allow ourselves to feel sadness when it arrives, to embrace and bring kindness to it — not judge ourselves for experiencing it — it is then that we grow truly strong. We know that we can confidently face whatever comes. True strength can only arise out of the truth.

So too, when we are able to feel sadness, we are also able to feel joy when it shows up, and the gratitude that accompanies it. We cannot deny the emotions that we don’t want and expect ourselves to be able to fully experience the emotions that we do want. We do not need to expend so much effort trying to control our lives so that sadness is kept out; such is a task for Sisyphus. What we need is to teach ourselves and our children that when sad things happen, we are sad — that sadness comes and goes (as does happiness) and that ultimately, we can stand like the big oak tree and weather whatever winds pass through us. To be strong is not to outrun sadness, but rather to learn to embrace it when it is here, to take good care of it so that it can heal. This is a warrior’s strength, a wise parent’s strength. The sadness will pass, as all emotions do, but we will remain, stronger and more solid in our ability to 
live — and love — with what is.” 

For the full article this came out of please click here.

2/14/12 – Love Actually is All Around

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“Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the arrivals gate at Heathrow Airport. General opinion’s starting to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don’t see that. It seems to me that love is everywhere. Often, it’s not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it’s always there – fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends. When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know, none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge – they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I’ve got a sneaking suspicion… love actually is all around.” – Prime Minister, Love Actually

This is, by far, one of my favorite movies of all time. It does an excellent job of following eight very different couples in dealing with their love lives. IMDB defines the story line as the following, “The characters are falling in love, falling out of love, some are with right people, some are with the wrong people, some are looking to have an affair, some are in the period of mourning; a capsule summary of reality. Love begins and love ends. They flirt a lot. They are all flirting with love. At all ages and social levels, love is the theme. Romantic love and brotherly love is the hotchpotch through out the movie.”

It opens your eyes to the many levels of the word “love.” Today, being Valentine’s day and all, I was reminded of this film and pondered the definition of love quite a bit. Yes, to many it is a Hallmark holiday. And, yes, I feel that love should be shared with those you love every day of the year, not just one day. But, having one day when you share this love a little extra can’t hurt right? It reminds you that you can’t escape love. The card aisle of Walgreens, the commercials on tv, the Valentine’s Day episodes of your favorite sitcoms make sure that you don’t miss out on February 14th. So I’ve accepted that, and don’t see it as a day that makes a difference if I’m single or not. It doesn’t matter. Why? Because I am SO loved! By my family, my friends, my dog, my co-workers and possibly even by people I don’t know. I also love SO many people in this world more than I can ever explain to them.

So, for those of you that find this holiday silly and possibly even depressing, take a different perspective and be happy to know that we have a day dedicated to love instead of days dedicated to hate. Take the time to tell your loved ones that you love them and take today as a reminder of how important it is to be and feel loved, and take it with you ever day, sharing your love every chance you get. February 14th? Just another Tuesday this year? Nah, it’s more thought provoking than that. It’s a reminder that love actually is all around!

Happy Love Day Friends!

My favorite scene from the movie is linked to Hugh!

2/12/12 – The Greatest Love of All

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“The greatest love of all, Is easy to achieve , Learning to love yourself , It is the greatest love of all…” – 

“The Greatest Love of All,”  Whitney Houston

Yes, it is sad, devastating, heart-breaking and down-right disappointing to lose a gift like Whitney Houston so young. The energy and sadness expressed on TV, the internet, social media sites, text messages and casual conversations reminds me of almost 3 years ago when we lost Michael Jackson. It makes you wonder the pressure society and the media put on these stars. Would I be able to handle that pressure? Maybe, maybe not. But I think it has a lot to do with the age and maturity of people when they come into the lime light. I guess that’s why Oprah said, “If you come to fame not understanding who you are, it will define who you are.”

I think one of my favorite quotes that defines the good and evil of fame is by William Blake, “The strongest poison ever known came from Caesar’s laurel crown.” I think we forget that even though celebrities are talented beyond our understanding, that they have a gift that most of us will never possess, that they are just people too. We define them by their gift instead of by the people they truly are. Is that society’s fault?  Not 100%, but I think when these stars start so young it is the responsibility of the adults around them to help keep them grounded, reminding them to love themselves and to keep them on a positive track until they grow into self-understanding adults.

The reason this death upsets me the most is the role that drugs play in so many of the deaths of young celebrities. I know it hasn’t been said what killed Whitney, but we do know the role drugs played in her life previously. We accept drug use and fame as two peas in a pod. We see it normal and okay that pop stars, rappers, actors and artists use drugs and we even pride them on how it helps them to create inspiring “art.” This has to stop. It is not okay for anyone to suffer from such an addiction. Addicts are hiding so much deep down and suffering inside from pain we can’t begin to understand. Instead of accepting this and sometimes applauding it or cracking jokes about it, let’s make an active effort as a society to change the image that has become the norm in this world. I’ve personally been affected by drug use in my life and it is unreal the power that drugs have on a person and it’s too painful to watch. I was lucky enough not to lose the one I love to addiction but what about the family, friends, fans and admirers of such talents like: Amy Winehouse, Kurt Cobain, Michael Jackson, Heath Ledger, Whitney Houston, Janis Joplin, Jim Morrison, Brittany Murphy, Jimi Hendrix, Judy Garland, River Phoenix, Anna Nicole Smith, and the list goes on and on.

The song “The Greatest Love of All” by Whitney Houston has a very powerful message. I have pasted half of the song below and linked the performance to her picture. Let’s remind our children about the important things in life and to love themselves. It’s so sad to me that she could sing a song about loving yourself when she struggled with that herself.

“I believe the children are our are future
Teach them well and let them lead the way
Show them all the beauty they possess inside
Give them a sense of pride to make it easier
Let the children’s laughter remind us how we used to be
Everybody searching for a hero
People need someone to look up to
I never found anyone who fulfill my needs
A lonely place to be
So I learned to depend on me

I decided long ago, never to walk in anyone’s shadows
If I fail, if I succeed
At least I’ll live as I believe
No matter what they take from me
They can’t take away my dignity
Because the greatest love of all
Is happening to me
I found the greatest love of all
Inside of me
The greatest love of all
Is easy to achieve
Learning to love yourself
It is the greatest love of all”

2/7/12 – “Don’t Put Anyone out of Your Heart”

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“It was an important reminder not to cast anyone out of our hearts, for in the process we are casting out ourselves. If we feel affected by someone being dismissive, critical or hurtful, it is invariably because there is a hook in us for that negativity to grab hold of, a place where it can land and trigger all our hidden feelings of unworthiness, insecurity, and self-doubt.” – Ed and Deb Shapiro

This is from an article titled “Don’t Put Anyone out of Your Heart” from Huffington Post today. It hits home so personally for me TODAY that I don’t even want to share my story, I just want to share the article. It is VERY powerful and I truly hope that all of you take the time to read the link attached to the picture below. To fully understand the meaning, you need to read the article.

Just remember, when someone seems like they are being dismissive, critical or hurtful, it’s because what they have said or done is hitting hidden feelings of your own allowing them to be intensified, causing these negative reactions and exposing insecurities, self-doubt or some other ignored emotions.

“Metta asks that we stay caring, that we keep our heart open to the situation we are struggling with and all the accompanying annoyance and anger, and hold ourselves with gentle tenderness. Then, amazing change is possible.”