Monthly Archives: March 2012

3/30 and 3/31/12 – Own your thoughts, say them out loud

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“The idea of speaking your thoughts out loud is so important. It’s been downplayed recently because now we have medication to help people in situations. But I think it’s important to talk your thoughts out loud, because you don’t really own them until you do that.” – Diane Keaton

I think I forget a lot of the time that just because I think it and feel it, others know what’s going on in my head, but how silly is that? Unless I say my thoughts out loud, I can’t expect anyone to respect or understand them. No one is a mind reader, if you want someone to know something or for others to know how you feel, just tell them, say it out loud. If not, there is no one to blame but you for not being heard and others not understanding.

Like Diane says in this quote, we do have medications these days that help others to “feel better” or to calm their anxieties, but this scares me. Pills will help many to balance their bodies chemically, but holding thoughts in and expecting them to just go away without any effort of your own is a little crazy to me. Get things off your trust, be heard and own your thoughts. This is really all we have that truly belongs to us as individuals so share…

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3/29/12 – Labeling People

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“The moment you put a mental label on another human being, you can never truly relate to that person.” – Eckhart Tolle

I realized that no matter who we meet in this world or when and how we meet them, we label them very quickly. We immediately base our opinion of a person on a first impression, maybe a few things they have shared about themselves or even on things we have heard about them and give them a label in our mind based on what we have experienced throughout our lives. To me this is really unfair. It takes a long time to truly get to know someone and labels are something that society has created for us when no one person fits the mold of just one label.

Every single person in this world is so individual and different that there is not one person exactly like them. You can’t compare two people, for example, because they were both born in the same state, or country for that matter. Those characteristics mean nothing except for on a birth certificate. I think that our country in particular has a huge problem with labels. Whether it be by race, gender, sexual orientation or religion, we are quick to judge and quick to categorize the people we meet, sometimes out of fear, many times out of ignorance. I know that I have been a victim of that as I have been on the other end just as much. The moment you label someone and preconceive that you know everything about them, you wil never truly be able to relate to them. You have created your own blinders and will never truly be able to understand the truth they tell or show you about themselves. It’s sad and I really hope that I can void myself of this. It isn’t easy. We are a world of symbols used to label things, so we naturally do that with people. I just hope that people can work on being more open minded, accepting and willing to learn about others before making assumptions. We could lose out on learning so much about others, ourselves and this world and may even lose out on getting to know some really awesome new people.

3/27/12 – Take a step back

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“Sometimes, it’s ok to take a step back and admit you’re being ridiculous.”

Isn’t it funny how we lose track of ourselves sometimes? We just go go go and forgot to take a step back and re-evaluate. Why am I doing this? Why did I say that? What’s my goal here? What am I trying to accomplish? What do I want and need? Why do I want or need this? Am I moving in a positive direction? How is my behavior affecting those around me? Am I acting like myself?

You know that saying, “Check yourself before you wreck yourself”? haha Well, I recently had to check myself and ask myself these questions. Emotions were running high and I had become someone that I don’t like being. I lost track of why I was even acting the way I was. I forgot what my true end goal was. I was being RIDICULOUS! After re-evaluation, not only am I back on track but I feel SO much better. I’ve gone back to my inner peace. After some much needed “soul-talk,” I again feel grounded and no longer feel ridiculous.

It’s ok to be knocked off your “pride” pedestal and pour some ice water on your ego. It doesn’t even have anything to do with pride and ego at the core, it has to do with getting carried away and lost in habitually behavior and we all do it. So next time you feel like your ride on life’s highway is going a little too fast and getting a little out of control, go in reverse for a second and “check yourself.” It’s okay to admit you’re being a little ridiculous, it’s what learning and growing is all about. Please click the image below and read the article on “soul-talk.” It really helped me get to this place.

3/23/12 – It’s OK to Disappoint People

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“Disappointment, as uncomfortable and even painful as it can be for me and many of us, is essential and important on our journey of growth, self-discovery, authenticity and fulfillment. ” – Mike Robbins

This came from the an article by Mike Robbins titled, It’s OK to Disappoint People.You can red the article by clicking its title. It really opened my eyes. I think many of us spend so much time and energy worry about disappointing others or worrying about being disappointed. No matter what we do, both are going to happen in life, we can’t avoid it. Not everyone is always going to be happy with what you say or choose to do, and that’s alright. We can use these moments of disappointment as learning curves on our journey.

I think if I step back and start to really express and do that which I REALLY want to do I will be happier. Too few of us focus on what we actually want and need to be happy out of fear of disappointment. Robbins makes a good point in the article and a friend of mine and I discussed this the other day; what it is we truly desire:

Expand and express your desires. Make a list (mental or written) of some of the most important and vulnerable desires you currently have — the things you really want, but maybe have been afraid to admit (due to a fear of being disappointed). Many of us, myself included, don’t ask for things, go for things or express things unless we’re pretty sure we can make them happen, get them, or be sure people will respond to them in a positive way. While this makes sense, it’s also quite limiting. When you allow yourself to tap into and express your authentic desires, even if what you want doesn’t seem “possible” at the moment, you give yourself the freedom to ask, dream and create. One of my favorite sayings is, “The answer’s always ‘no’ if you don’t ask.” Start asking!

What do YOU desire? Make a list and listen to yourself. Try and please you and you alone, the rest will fall into place as it should. Disappointment is inevitable because we all have different agendas. Stick to yours! As once said, “Do not follow the ideas of others, but learn to listen to the voice within yourself.”

3/21/12 – Acceptance

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“Acceptance has nothing to do with surrender or capitulation, but everything to do with making the most of your potential.”

Generally we have what we’ve been given, and it’s up to us to do with them what we will. Instead of being defeated by circumstances and thinking that accepting what “is” as “enough” is a bad thing or that you’re surrendering to something, look at it as making the most of what you have been given and what you are able to do, not what you haven’t been given or are unable to do.

It’s very easy to see acceptance as failure but it’s quite the opposite. Many times, simply accepting things helps to avoid discouragement or the feeling that you aren’t enough. We can only do our best and be happy with that. Some expectations we put on ourselves just aren’t attainable, not because we aren’t good enough, just because we have simply reached our potential using what we have been given. You are enough, accept that!

So who do you want to be? Where do you want to go? Might it be possible that you already have the necessary building blocks?

3/20/12 – Now and Then

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“Things will happen in your life that you can’t stop. But that’s no reason to shut out the world.” – Crazy Pete, Now and Then 

I whole heatedly believe in this quote. First of all, AMAZING movie! Second, what a beautiful way to view life. We have no control over most of what happens in this life but we do have control over how we respond to it. I personally don’t think that shutting out the world helps at all. At first, I know that this is a normal reaction to traumatic situations, but you can’t hide from the world and keep all your feelings and emotions in forever. It will drive you crazy and make you sick.

You only get one life, whether it’s an easy ride or the most challenging thing in this world, you have to keep living it, fighting it, rising above it, because wasting the one chance you get to experience this world is a true tragedy and I can’t think of anything more traumatic than that. “When I find myself in times of trouble, mother Mary comes to me, speaking words of wisdom, let it be.” Just let it be and when you are in times of trouble, welcome all the help and support you can get. That’s what it is there for, to build you up when you can’t do it yourself. So keep moving, take support when it’s offered and know that it is okay to shut down for a sec to revamp and start back up again just a little stronger than before.

Easier said than done, I know, but it’s a lot easier to fight a battle with your own personal army of family and friends than it is to fight it alone!

3/19/12 – Turning Negative Emotions to Positive

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“Anytime you feel negative emotion, stop and say: Something is important here; otherwise, I would not be feeling this negative emotion. What is it that I want? And then simply turn your attention to what you do want. . . . In the moment you turn your attention to what you want, the negative attraction will stop; and in the moment the negative attraction stops, the positive attraction will begin. And—in that moment—your feeling will change from not feeling good to feeling good.”

That’s all, just a thought, speaks for itself.  But I can tell you this, I’ve had some negative thoughts taking over lately and when I got to the bottom of what I needed and wanted, I turned my attention to that, focused on that and then worked with those around me on how to get it. Won’t lie….”ohhh, ohhhh, sometimes, I get a good feelin’… yea!” (Linked below)

The power of positive emotions, thoughts and feelings is crazy! Think about your thoughts. Are they positive? If not, why not? Make an effort. You are the ONLY one that has control over your thoughts and your happiness.

3/15/12 – The Condition of Love

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“Love is the condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.” – Robert Heinlein

You know what’s funny about this? I was just having the conversation the other week about how I get my energy from being around others. Many will say, “Go home, relax, recharge.” When really I need the opposite, I need to get out, soak up the positive and healthy energy of others. When others are happy it makes me happy. It’s just who I am. I’m happiest when my friends and family and others around me are happy.

So, I guess what I’m saying is that I love people! Like, I genuinely just love all people. Yes, there are times when I say, “Man I hate people!” But I don’t mean it (hate is too strong of a word to mean it, maybe I shall use a different word next time), I’m just annoyed with ignorance at the moment or maybe just taking out my mood on others. Because when it comes down to it I find the uniqueness of individuals to be so intriguing and fulfilling. I love to learn about any and everyone, their interests, their backgrounds, how their minds work, etc. Even seeing strangers around me laugh and be happy, makes me happy. I LOVE it! This all sort of completes me in a corny Jerry McGuire kind of way, it’s hard to explain. People are just beautiful to me and it is their quirkiness and possibly the things they consider flaws that I love the most.

So “love,” here, in this quote, to me, isn’t romantic love necessarily, just LOVE in any term of the word! I’m in love with people haha As funny as it may sound, It’s a condition I have.