10/18/11 – Create Yourself

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“Life isn’t about finding yourself; life is about creating yourself.” – George Bernard Shaw

When I decided to move to Spain in 2006, I told my dad about this decision in an email. I knew that there was no way I could say it to his face because, if anyone could keep me from going, it would be him. So, two weeks later, when he met me in the Marshall’s parking lot (go figure, my father in a Marshall’s parking lot haha) he looked at me, realizing how important his support was, and said that he supported me. BUT, immediately following that, he asked me a question that I never understand until right now, “Is this about you ‘finding yourself’ again? Because you have to stop trying to do that.”

I said no because that’s what he wanted and needed to hear, but I was lying. I really thought that I was going to do that and, until today, I thought that is what happened over there. Not until about 5 minutes ago did I get what my father meant. I couldn’t find myself, I wasn’t lost. I was right there and I had control over who I was and my own happiness. I didn’t ‘find’ myself in Spain, I created myself, like I have continued to do day after day since then.

Life is about creating yourself. You don’t have to find who you are, you have control over the person that you become and if you reach your goals. You ‘find’ yourself within yourself.  We are the only ones that have control over who we are. I work every day doing everything I can to become the best person I can. I may slip sometimes, but I will never stop moving forward with this process.

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